Intermarriage †opposition Essay

Marshall Sklare was able to articulate the fears of many older Jews and he wrote: Intermarriage (and its sociodemographic consequences) can no longer be treated as marginal when it is the result of a deep-rooted sociopolitical ideology and value structure and a function of lifestyle, residential pattern and educational and occupational structure †¦ The intermarriage issue has become central to the internal struggles of American Jewry (1982, p. 37). Aside from the fact that the older generation seemed to be in a perpetual survival mode of existence, keeping to themselves to continue Jewish values and traditions, there is a deeper reason why many are opposed to the idea of exogamy. Steven Bayme explains that the rise of intermarriage is a threat because it can only mean the, â€Å"†¦ decline of Jewish commitment, a weakness in Jewish identity, a failure of Jewish education and the Jewish family to bring about the commitment to Jewish continuity†¦ † (2002, p. 226). If this is true then it will just reveal the error of their ways. This is because suppressing the symptoms will not make the sickness go away. If the symptom for impiety and the shortcomings of a flawed educational system is the high rate of intermarriage then opposing exogamy will not change the fact that there is problem with Judaism. Traditionalists made their opinions known; that they do not agree to intermarriages but this seems to be an idea suited for past generations who cannot see the possibility of compromise in the land of the heathen. A popular 1950s joke regarding this matter was an accurate depiction of how parents felt about their children marrying non-Jews. The following dialog is between a young Jewish soldier coming home from the Korean War and his mother. Before the young man left Korea he calls his mother to inform her about the good news (Shapiro, year, p. 233). Son: I have survived the war without being wounded. Mother: That is good. Son: I am bringing home a Korean wife Mother: That is also good. Son: We don’t have a place to live. Mother: That’s okay. You can stay in my apartment. Son: But you live in a one-bedroom apartment. Mother: That’s no problem. After I put the phone down I am going to jump out of the window, and you will have the entire apartment to yourself. According to Bayme, when it dawned upon the Jewish community that intermarriage is snowballing into something that can overwhelm them, the reaction was radical and aimed at the jugular to forcibly stop the perceived madness and he adds: When the first news of the growth of intermarriage occurred, communal leaders responded with agony and handwriting. Virtually all Jewish organizations passed resolutions and statements signaling opposition to intermarriage. Conferences were held about what we can do in the face of this tidal wave (2002, p. 226). Calvin Goldsheider pointed out that even as late as the 20th century the reaction was fairly dramatic. Opposition to the marriage was made plain by, â€Å"†¦ Jewish mourning rituals of sitting shiva or reciting kaddish†¦ † (2004, p. 29). It must have been a disconcerting sight for a son to see his parents lamenting his decision to take a bride not from his people. Rising Tide But it seems that no matter what type of measures was put in place to discourage interfaith marriages; more and more Jews chose to be joined with a non-Jew. It is therefore understandable that others may conclude rebellion to the norms and traditions of Judaism as the number one culprit. But more and more studies claim the contrary. In fact Shapiro remarked the traditional scape goat for the high rate of intermarriage no longer applies. Marshall Sklare, a noted sociologist on American Jewry, warned that, â€Å"†¦ attributing intermarriage among Jews to self-hatred, cowardice in the face of anti-Semitism, or social climbing misread its etiology †¦ because marriages with Gentiles increased while anti-Semitism was dwindling and many of the social traditional status distinctions were being swept away† (as qtd. in Shapiro, 1992, p. 235). Bayme supports the finding of Shapiro and Sklare and was very practical in his approach for he said that differences in religion are not a significant consideration to young couples of today. Bayme also added that American society values romantic love more than it values differences in religious beliefs. And to top all that Jews are contending with an unexpected external force, â€Å"†¦ 87 percent of Americans welcome marriage to a Jew†¦ † a rather surprising revelation considering what the Jews had to endure for centuries (2002, 226). Now if the reasons for the rising rate of interfaith marriages can be explained in terms of love, openness, acceptance and the realization that every human being is created equal in the sight of God then what kind of community will dare go against universally accepted principles? More so, what kind of community will have the resolve to continually fight for exogamy in the face of a â€Å"love† assault? Surely, only a few can resist the advances of a determined lover and that may well be the number one reason why this crisis – at least in the eyes of Jewish elders – could not be contained. Resolution Marshall Sklare minced no words in asserting that there are only two definitive actions that can be used to settle the issue: 1. Change the social structure and value orientation of the American Jewish community; or 2.accommodate and accept the intermarried (1982, p. 37). Since option no. 1 is clearly unacceptable then the Jewish people are only left with one choice and it is to go out and welcome the non-Jew spouse into Jewish life. This is a view espoused by Calvin Goldscheider who believes that it is a blessing in disguise and contrary to antiquated and popular opinion the high rate of intermarriage will ensure the survival of the Jewish race both in numbers and in cultural distinctiveness. A seemingly incompatible set of ideas considering the nature of Jewish life. Goldscheider summarizes his argument into the following statements: The key indicators of an ethnic community’s strength, however, are not who marries whom, but the activities that their grandchildren engage in. A group’s continuity depends on the ethnic and religious commitments of the family. Focusing on families and the ethnic commitments of the young redirects questions about assimilation away from biology and marriage and toward economic activities, cultural obligations and how parents pass on traditions to their children. In this regard, the American Jewish community is surviving, maybe even thriving† (2003, p. 282). Goldscheider arrived at the aforementioned conclusion as a consequence of the following research findings: ? The decline of the American Jewish community is a product of exaggeration and sensationalization of the facts; ? Interfaith marriages were assumed to result in complete and immediate conversion of the Jewish partner into non-Jewish religion, practices, and customs;? the terms used to define modern day Jews were biased towards the already assumed conclusion that there is a significant decline in their numbers; ? The numbers did not add up considering that there is a significant number of non-Jewish spouses who convert to Judaism, or informally integrate into the community and follow Jewish customs and traditions; and ? previous studies did not account the fact that in many intermarriages the intermarried couples decided that their children will grow up as Jews or at least encourage them to practice Jewish customs and traditions.